On the beloved AIM program that I fear eats my time, I was talking to Magdelena and was asked to describe my friend Hannah - Madame Feu Cheveux to you all. This seeded the idea of classifying my friends into species. So i'm going to write a short article on the first few that come to mind. Starting with the original:

"Hannah"
Homo Amor-Motherlandus

Hannah, a gentle herbivore, spends her life grazing on various forms of literature. Meditative and slow to anger, she lives up to her flame-haired name when fuelled with Righteous Moral Conviction. Her habit of listening whenever someone needs her to leads us to believe that she lives on a diet of the problems of others as well as vegetables and smutty fanfiction. When male Homo Sapiens in pickup trucks come across her, they feel the need to beep their horns. This is generally assumed to be some kind of mating call to which she is so far unresponsive.

"Trish"
Homo Ranticus

Prone to fits of strange shuddering she herself refers to as 'twitching', our top researchers can only theorise as to the nature of this creature's habits. Her diet of ramen, caffiene and ramen is a source of mystery to scientists, who cannot discern what link this creature has to the rest of nature. Her gregariously charming mannerisms are a source of enrapturement to many other creatures, who sit in what scientists believe is either awe or fear of her pure insanity. Scientists believe that her mood swings are inexplicable even to herself, although possibly to Oscar Wilde.

"Dalton"
Not-Homo! Guitarus

This shaggy but benevolent creature's habitat is almost exclusively limited to the soundproofed Music Rooms, where he engages in "band practice" with other members of the genus Musician. Although startling to behold at first due to the long, wavy hair that covers much of his face, this creature is gentle and intelligent, responding very well to treats such as cookies and condensed milk. He does, however, require care and affection, remaining a rewarding companion to those who understand the significance of such activities as "Playing Guitar" and "Watching Wayne's World."

"Magdelena"
Homo Dramaticuas

Magdelena, believed by top researchers to be a missing link between the genuses Dramakid and Poetical is often mistaked for an Emo by amateurs. Her fragile habitat, under constant attack by companies and the education system, lies between her ears and is currently shortlisted as the Eighth Wonder of the World. An exercise-hating herbivore, she has never been seen to run in living memory, and searches for intellectual sustenance in such places as Local Theatre and Art Gallery.

"Melissa"
Homo Geeklordicus

A reclusive species, this intelligent being tends to avoid sunlight where possible in favour of the lighting provided by a computor screen. She is to be observed in various unique habitats, notably her own imagination, Azeroth and some that have yet to be determined. She depends more on science fiction than food for her sustenance, requiring only that her companions display a moderate level of intelligence and do not ask her what a Siberia is.
Her legendary patience is, however, compatible with the hyperactivity of both Homo Ranticus and the Homo Hippius whose existence has been postulated by another research team.

"Matt"
Homo Obsessivus

Matt has a characteristic in common with Homo Nerdtasticus in that one if his primary habitats is Azeroth, but differs in that he attempts to transfer this habitat into the one in which he interacts with 'real people'. His constant cry of "Jeffhardy...!" followed by a sentance leads scientists to believe that he has a differently constructed language module to other hominids. Other behaviours observed in Homo Obsessivus lead us to believe he has little, if any, aggressive drive. This is probably why the gentle creature lives in Azeroth.

If this made you laugh, then this link [link] to the Super Fun Land of Flowers should really make you smile. I love you all!